I hear it all the time. One minute things are going great. Moving forward, feeling aligned, maybe something wonderful even has happened, nekminit....
It all comes crashing down.
One crisis after another.
One step forward, two steps back.
Same as it's always been. Life throwing a spanner in the works, just like we knew it would. Just like that nagging little voice, told us.
"It won't last, something will go wrong. The other shoe will drop...."
Even when things are going good, we keep beating ourselves up continuously for no reason.
We make progress, and then BAM... We get drunk and make a fool of ourselves. We give in to our cravings, we find ourselves playing out the same old negative behaviors in our relationships, with our children, our parents, ourselves.
And we're back where we started.
Doubting ourselves all over again....
And afraid, because now we're wondering, "will it always be like this?"
As frustrating as it is there's actually a very good reason for what's really going on here. And NO, it doesn't have to always be like this. It's like this because you're unconscious to what's really happening beneath the surface.
You see the sabotage that you think is against you is actually has a purpose, it's trying to protect you. I know that sounds weird but stick with me.
Most people have never experienced the kind of happiness and success they dream of. In fact the opposite is true. We know struggle, we no loss, we know betrayal and rejection and that feeling of unworthiness that runs through our veins like the writing on a stick of rock.
We have all kinds of deep rooted beliefs attached to our negative experiences that keep us attracting them back into our lives.
We fear true happiness because we're not sure we deserve it, that we could hold onto it, feel comfortable with it. And that's the key, we actually feel more comfortable with the struggle because its what we know.
So when we start improving ourselves and our lives and we bring more positive energy into our field, it's as though a switch in us trips. An alarm goes off warning the subconscious that positive energy doesn't align with the negative beliefs we hold about ourselves. And the subconscious will do what needs to be done to protect those beliefs.
It doesn't care if they're positive and good for us, or negative and bad for us. It simply protects the belief. If I don't believe I deserve a loving, supportive relationship because I was exposed to the opposite growing up and I formed a belief around that experience, then I'll keep sabotaging my own chance of finding that relationship. Or I'll simply keep attracting people who give me the opposite of what I say I want but don't actually believe I can have.
We have to unravel those beliefs, the majority of which were formed in childhood from our very limited perspective and often in response to experiences seeped in fear and emotional disconnect.
Our beliefs are not who we are, but they help create our reality.
What's really happening is that we're fighting ourselves, pulling and pushing, back and forward. The conscious belief, 'I want change' is always wrestling with the unconscious belief, 'I don't deserve it, or change isn't safe.'
We have to make the unconsious conscious. That's the awakening our soul is waiting for.
There's a process to changing beliefs and also to priming the body to accept more positive energy. We need to train the nervous system to experience more of the states of being truly happy and let it know that it's safe to feel this.
Because all too often happiness triggers the fear part of us that fears the very feeling we want. That's the little voice. That's the part that gets to work spreading the fear in us that it won't last.
And when crisis hits, that part can relax again because its used to that old feeling. And what its used to it feels safe in.
The key is to keep affirming your willingness not just to move forward but to let go of the need you have to hold on to the beliefs. Know that each time you take a step or two back you're actually been shown that you need to look deeper inside of yourself and see what's holding you back.
Because you have to go back to move forward. You have to clear what's back there that's keeping you stuck.
And you're actually closer than you think. Which is why you're sabotaging yourself in the first place because you're moving closer to unravelling the fear and living free from it. And it's responding to that.
Don't give up trying ... as old Red said "either get busy livin', or get busy dying."
Your happiest truest life is waiting for you, YOU ARE THE KEY. Knowing yourself and what's going on inside you is crucial to your having the kind of life that right now you can only dream of, but is absolutely possible for you, for us all!
You're not f*cking it all up, you're just operating from the unconscious parts of yourself that you need to unravel. This is the journey for us all, but I can assure you, once you begin unraveling, your on the path to glorious freedom and massive leaps forward!
If you need help working through the beliefs holding you back connect with me for a FREE Discovery Call and find out how I can help. You don't need to stay stuck in this holding pattern, you just need to discover what the fear is that's keeping you there.
Your happiest, truest life is waiting for you!